DEAR DAWG: Snort, here. Rip Snort. Intrepid Reporter and Friend of the Truth. Dawg, the Serenity Falls community has been rocked by the revelation that we have a person serving on our school board who has a criminal record based on prostitution. A hooker on the board, Dawg!! This started as a rumor, expanded to multiple social media posts, and has now been confirmed through Your Intrepid Reporter’s in-depth investigation. Ms. Downyshanks is now a respectable member of our community, the mother of two high school students, and currently the president of the Band Boosters. But her conviction for prostitution is a matter of public record, and has now come to light. I’ve done my research on this, Dawg, and discovered Section 11.066 of the Education Code which reads as follows:
A person is ineligible to serve as a member of the board of trustees of a school district if the person has been convicted of a felony or an offense under Section 43.02(b) of the Penal Code.
This conviction was a misdemeanor, but it was based on Penal Code 43.02, which is entitled PROSTITUTION. So how do we go about removing this soiled angel from the board?
DEAR SNORT: It will have to wait for the next election, Snort. Please note that the only misdemeanor that makes a person ineligible to serve on the school board has to be based on Penal Code 43.02(b). Note the (b) part, Snort. Subsection (a) of that statute makes it a crime to offer or agree to accept money for sex. Sounds like that’s what your board member was convicted of. But (b) reads as follows:
A person commits an offense if the person knowingly offers or agrees to pay a fee to another person for the purpose of engaging in sexual conduct with that person or another.
To put this in the language of the street, the hooker can serve on the board. The john cannot. Section 43.02(b) applies to solicitation of sex for money, not the consummation of the deal. Someone should do some research to figure out why the legislature drew this distinction, especially since it has a disproportionate impact on men. But there it is. So we wish Ms. Downyshanks our best as she continues to serve your community.
DAWG BONE: HOOKERS CAN SERVE ON THE BOARD, BUT THOSE WHO PAY THEM CANNOT. MAKE SENSE TO YOU? ME NEITHER.
Tomorrow: Toolbox Tuesday!!